Read before going out to eat

If you apply these principles when going out to eat, your service will be much more efficient. :-)


(EVERYTHING that EVERYONE does in a busy restaurant affects EVERYBODY. Why not try to cooperate? You'll just get better, faster service which is exactly what we want to give you.)


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Don’t ask for separate checks. If you don’t trust the people you are dining with to pay their proper share, you probably shouldn’t be dining with them. Separate checks slow your order as they cause more work and confusion in the kitchen and more time for the server to cash you out. If worse comes to worse and you are forced to dine with a cheapie or a business partner, tell us you need separate checks RIGHT AT THE START before you even order a drink or appetizer. This will make your service ten times faster, trust me.

And sit beside the people who are on the same check with you.


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Clean up after your children, for the love of God. Do you let them throw spaghetti at home??? Don’t just sigh helplessly as your waiter surveys the slop your child has just spread across the floor. Do you realize that you are causing the patrons after you to wait longer for their tables while the buspeople are swabbing the 5-foot radius of mess around the table? Keep your brats seated in their chairs. They should not be running around a restaurant where people are carrying heavy, scalding-hot dishes high upon trays, dishes that could shatter into shards of glass just perfect for slicing clean through little jugular veins. Order FOR little Johnny, no matter how cute you think it is to see the waitress trying to coax his order out of him. You KNOW what your kids eat. Avoid the trying process of the child changing his mind 20 times or refusing to order while the waitress stands there waiting and waiting and waiting.


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If you haven’t decided, just tell your server you need more time. It’s that easy. She’ll come back. What she hates is you holding her there while you scan all 50 items on the menu AGAIN as her work piles up and patrons at the other tables are getting impatient, and her food that has just come up in the kitchen is getting cold and dry, and table 4 is waiting for change, and the couple in the corner is ready to order.


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There are little signals you can give your server to help him give you better service. Unfortunately, most restaurant patrons don’t know them.

CLOSE your menu when you are ready to order. Most servers don’t like to butt in and rush you if it appears you are still browsing.

Catch your server’s eye when you need something. Add this to an expectant look, and your server should come right over. No need to snap your fingers, wave furiously, whistle, yell, or tug on his apron when he is talking to another guest. All of the latter actions will probably guarantee that you will be ignored a bit longer. I can do a great impression of not noticing your rude display.

If you are ready to pay after the bill has been placed on the table, place the check holder to the edge of the table. You can even let the money or the credit card stick out a little. No good server grabs the check holder to see if you’ve put the money in it yet. He or she waits for a signal so as not to rush you.

If you want the server to keep the change, tell him. Just saying “Thank you” or nothing is not enough, and he will probably stand in line at the cashier or fumble around for the right coins and bill combination unnecessarily. Now, this won’t affect you in particular, but it will affect the customers after you.

If you have dietary needs of other food preferences, just TELL us when you order, not when we bring out the food. Again, this affects everybody--negatively.

Place your fork and knife tines down and beside each other on the plate if you have finished with your food. That way the server need not butt in to see if she can take your plate.


(This entry was written by one of my girlfriends)