I've lived several lives, very different lifestyles. My life has been complete. Everything I've ever wanted to do or experience, I have. I'm lucky and proactive at the same time.
I am thankful for all the wonderful opportunities in my life. Not to say I haven't had my share of dark times; I've probably had more.
Bad experiences built character. Some were caused by others, some completely within myself. For example, being stalked taught me to live my life as if someone was always watching. When you live your life this way, you are a better person. Not to say stalking has any positive qualities; however, in reaction to it I learned to live as if I were Jim Carey in the Truman Show. Another example was when I used self-medicating and destructive coping techniques to deal with my life after my sister died. The drug, alcohol, and sexual experiences I had taught me that I wasn't as strong as I had thought and not to judge other people for their coping techniques. Discovering my susceptibility knocked me off my Princess Pedestal and increased my empathy for others.
I regret none of the choices I've made in life and am thankful for them. While difficult, an important step for me was ending friendships with people who remained stuck in their own dysfunctions. This isn't a rejection of them or a belief that I am superior--it is self-protection. My experiences with dysfunction has helped me easily recognize it and I don't want those people being part of my influential circle. Without judging them for their personal choices, I selectively choose my friends now based upon compatible values.
I hope everyone who reads this blog, also clicks and reads this other link: http://www.howtolive.com/fill-your-life-with-amazing-people/. Knowing this might just change your life. :) Be thankful for what you have experienced so far and live your life surrounded by friends who support the life you want going forward.
2 comments:
Oooh, this is a good one. Would have made a great Thanksgiving post...
This is one of the reasons why I do what I do. I allow myself to take big risks so that my future self doesn't look back at my present self to say, "See? You should have done that!" Good and bad experiences can help me so much, so why shield myself from either?
My eradication of so many people from my life last year was for the exact reasons posted here. If they are useless, why would I have them around me? If I'm only interested in moving forward, then the people around me must be like-minded or else they become a drag and liability in my life.
I... I will admit that I'm still on my King Pedestal. My childhood couldn't get me off it and cancer only reinforced it, so whatever's gonna knock me off this pedestal will probably be huge. Not looking forward to that day...
Thank you for your comment. :)
"Would have made a great Thanksgiving post..." -- It would have. But I didn't want to wait. :-p
Ironically, today's thought from the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
We pray for "courage to change the things we can.'' Change requires giving up familiar old ways to try something new. Even though the old ways brought us pain, they were known. Changing them for new ones feels risky; it could lead to pleasure . . . or to even more pain.
But if we don't try, we'll never know whether we can handle a new job, go back to school, work out a new relationship, or breathe new life into an old one. To try something new, we have to be willing to take risks and be vulnerable. We have to accept the responsibility and the consequences if our venture does not proceed as we had hoped it would.
Perhaps our addiction was a way of avoiding risk. Rather than take the chance of failing at something we wanted to do or being rejected by someone to whom we offered our friendship, we focused on our addiction. Are we ready, now, to take risks for something we really want?
Today, I can take a small risk in the interest of enriching my life.
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