Feminist women have trained men to believe that they do not have to be men anymore. Most men are oblivious, only noticing the money they save while courting and how much easier it is to get sex. But it runs much deeper than that. There is an inherent lack of respect for men by women once women have to take on a more masculine role. Why should I respect him as a man when I can be my own provider? Why should I respect his penis when I can easily get another?
What is the male role? The ability and desire to provide for and protect his family at all costs. A man's goal is to work and make as much money as he can to provide. While he's single, this is to prepare for his eventual wife and children. No real man would ever allow a woman to pay for dates, as doing so demasculates him to the core. The money saved doesn't justify the lost respect. Fathers who allow their children to go hungry, without clothes, or without intellectual stimulation aren't men either. Whether with his child's mother or not, a man will do whatever it takes to have enough money to make sure his family is ok. "Wanna-be men" believe that paying court-ordered child support (which they are often bitter about) is good enough. And lastly, men are supposed to be able to fix and repair things. Even if you have plenty of money to hire someone, the ability to do basic house and car repairs is expected of all men.
What is the female role? To be a caretaker and raise healthy children. Most women have jobs, yet at the same time this can defeminize them. A woman takes care of her family--and not by paying someone else to do it while she goes to work. A woman puts her children first (because they cannot protect themselves) and her partner second. Woman are excellent comforters and are there to lend a hug or supporting comment when her child or man needs it. Women are expected to "step back" when it's helpful towards encouraging her family to to grow and succeed. In addition, frugal shopping and cooking are essential skills all women should have.
Surely it is clear that I do not believe in equal rights. I never have. Men are providers and protectors; women are caretakers. This is natural and works the best because men and women are biologically different. In today's society, many females try to prove they are equal to or better than men. Sadly, laziness has caused just as many males to expect women to pick up the man's slack. Divorce rates in the U.S. are over 50%, and I am convinced this is why. Having a vagina doesn't make you a real woman just like having a penis doesn't make you a real man.
Once upon a time, men knew that they had to "step up" to the husband and father role when they got a woman pregnant. Now, instead of being selective when choosing sex partners, boys are taught (often by their parents!) that they have the option of running away from their male responsibility. Parents claim they want their children to be successful in everything; however, for the past 50 years these same parents have neglected insuring that their children can live up to the most basic of gender roles. These roles exist for a reason and create a harmonious society. When gender roles are not respected, everyone suffers. Do you have children? If so, are you teaching your son how to be a man? Your daughter how to be a woman?
Need help? While written in a religious context, these two books are the best I've seen for teaching a woman how to be proper wife: For Woman Only and More Hours In My Day. If you love your daughter, you will teach her these skills. You can also teach her how to be self-sufficient, but she needs to know how to be a proper woman first and foremost. When parents fail to teach their boys what it takes to be a man, women and children get neglected. Since I am a woman, I do not have any book suggestions for men--but I will start looking, and will add a comment below when I have some. If you do not live up to your gender role, you need to evaluate why and fix yourself.
**** Just a side note, after working in strip clubs I can tell you that most strippers have children. The same holds true for prostitutes. A large percentage are forced into adult work to support their child(ren) because the males who got them pregnant weren't really men. These women are often looked down upon, when in reality they do whatever it takes to take care of, provide for, and protect their children after a man has chosen not to be there.
1 comment:
Oooh, I had a smile on my face when I read this. This is like one of my rants, only intelligible and well done. Your last few post topics have really been interesting...
I've always hated what I deemed as the "pussification of Man", when I would see guys doing things that I considered unbecoming. The passenger side seat guys. I remember going out on dates and the check would come. The woman would say "I got this" and I would look at her as if she just called me a fag. I'd get offended and she would understand exactly who I am and what I'm about.
Normally I would say that a situation like this is not all the man's fault. Unfortunately in this case, it is. It comes from a long line of men not being men. It comes from young boys looking at their strong mothers and weak fathers which shaped their perceptions. It comes from men saying they are great fathers if they pay their child support on time and make time every other weekend. This is the low standard we men have set, and it's disgusting. I was always questioned why a woman would still want to be with me even after I show her all my faults and what kind of animal I am. But when I see the kind of dudes that are out there, I don't wonder anymore. It makes sense.
As far as the family unit goes, I think it's all a matter of doing your role. A man does what a man should do. A woman should do what I woman should do. A kid sees this and there's no confusion. And, despite what public opinion believes (a public, by the way, that has the highest divorce rate in the world), there is equal power in both roles. I mean, come on. Why would any self-respecting dude allow...
Wow... I didn't realize I had so much more to write. I guess I should end it here. You know, it may be true that I don't know too much about women. No woman will call me husband and no kid will call me father. But common sense is common sense and, when we see what's going on with the change in gender roles, it's so important to emphasize the bad along with the good. Excellent post, Trix...
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